It’s heading our way.
There’s an interruption to our scheduled programming
Which can’t be TiVo’ed over.
If you need any further information, please contact myself.
There’s a rumour going round that we’ve been eavesdropped on for years by
Hamlet’s father sifting our big data for fault lines.
There’s a hidden dimension which the one dimensional man,
Will be prompted to enter when his contract expires.
There’s a back door in the virtual world that leads to
The place where all entrepreneurs go to die.
There’s a software incompatability which
May invoke the Blue Screen of Death.
There’s a rumour that the future of humankind has
Been outsourced to the Chinese.
Roadworks will last three weeks and have brought
The city to a standstill. Check your smartphone for updates.
School students need to practise competitive sport
In case the lights go out.
Scientists have shown that the brain is like a
Tablet computer; cracked screens can be repaired
At a preferential rate.
We have learned that memorial gardens are full of
Those who refused to upgrade their operating systems.
Rate me. As an old man am I hot or not?
If Shakespeare were alive today, he would stream
His soliloquies to every room in your house.
The official statistics tell a different story but
I believe I am right.
Some oligarchs emailed. They want to take you on a journey.
O death, where is thy sting? It was removed
At a BUPA hospital with complimentary tea and coffee.
You can’t wrap your fish and chips in an iPad
And our dear departed are memes
Who will live for ever in the starry heavens.
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